The following is a narrative of how empowering I find grocery shopping to be. If you think this bizarre, you should hear how I feel when I drive on the freeway. Speaking of empowering, try listening to George Gershwin while shopping in the Container Store. What a trip.
I am a Queen in this Kingdom of fruits and vegetables, with my loyal steed of steel. I examine my subjects with the most critical of fingertips and most sensitive of sniffers. I am forever grateful for your selflessness, however, as I wheel you through the sliding doors towards certain death, where you will be sacrificed by saucepan.
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